Wednesday, March 9


I have a bone to pick. I'm so bummed, so disappointed. Just downright mad. 

This is the first time in five years that I have not been pregnant or breastfeeding. Yup, my littlest just weaned this week. Sniffle.

I am sad...looking back and missing those times that were more full. I look at my kids and know they are worth it, but look in the mirror and....blah

What the heck am I talking about??!!

the girls
mammary glands
milk jugs
fun bags
lady lumps
head lights
the twins


Post baby breasts. Post multiple baby breasts.
Previously nice, not large, but nice breasts. 

Now even less large, deflated, flat, miserable, not nice breasts. 

Blah breasts.

The girls have let me down.

Actually, the babies seem the have let the girls down. 

Call me vain, but this is just not fair.

It should really be a right of passage for mothers to be able to keep the full, firm breast of pregnancy and nursing. After all that...the swollen ankles, the sleepless nights, squeezing nine pound babies out of your hoo-ha, more sleepless nights and shower less weeks days, gnawed on nipples during teething...I mean really?! After all that we mothers are left with THESE?! 

You have GOT to be KIDDING ME! 

Forget sex-ed...I've got the key to preventing teen pregnancy...take a before and after pic of a lucky lady like myself and plaster it all over school hallways. No more pregnancy pacts there. Girls and guys will be thanking me from all over the world. 

I've never cared about 'em. Never longed for huge knockers. Never flaunted them. Never talked about them. 

Guess it's true, you don't know what you have until it's gone.

Girls, I miss you. 

Saggy's going to be a long and tumultuous relationship. 



  1. Omg! Why? Why did you have to post this!? You just made me think about ne'er wanting to give up nursing...let's not forget I haven't had a period in 3 years either!! I am going to be soooo sad to let go of mine!! Goodbye DDs goodbye forever!!

  2. OMG I am about peeing my pants! You are so right on girl!! this post is amazing and so true. It would be the best birth control. I always said I wish I would have enjoyed my nice boobs longer! Way to go and tell it like it is!

  3. erik plans on giving the twins a MASSIVE makeover once im done with the baby thing... so im not too worried! hahahah!

  4. omg HILARIOUS! i am worried about weaning too...however mine don't get too small, but MAN do they sag! :( so very sad!! victoria's secret here i come though...i am so OVER nursing bras! HA! :)

  5. The good news is you can totally buy some new ones!! HaHa!! You should start budgeting for that! :)

  6. Oh this post was so funny. So true. So very sad but true. I'm right there with ya girl. :)

  7. I remember my lactation nurse saying, don't think if you don't breastfeed that your boobs will weather the pregnancy. They won't. So, nurse away cuz they're goners anyway! LOL. I remember thinking, that's harsh! Well, I think more people should be warned! Wave that flag sister! Use your old bras to sew it with! HUGS!



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